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Joke of the Day

"What did the blind, one-legged retarded kid get for Christmas? cancer"

"Was the principal's brother really a missionary? He certainly was. He gave the people of the Cannibal Islands their first taste of Christianity !"

"What I learned from Titanic was that u need to have sex as soon as possilble with the person u like cause u never know what might happen."

"Teacher: Didn't you know the bell had gone? Fred: I didn't take it Miss."

"Me: look at these colorful leaves, fall is so beautiful Leaf: *cough* behold the desolation of my brothers *wheeze* death surrounds us all"

"We can't control the wind, but we have the power to adjust the sails."

"Why don't Jewish cannibals eat Germans? Because they give them gas."

"Saw a sign on the highway that said ""Kill or Injure a Road Worker: $7,500"" but it doesn't tell me where to pick up the money..."

"David was hard at work... it was really quite awkward for his coworkers."

"Which joke is better? How many tickles does it take to tickle an *inbred* octopus? Ten tickles. How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus? Ten tickles."