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Joke of the Day

"Good cop: I get it. You wanted an easy way out. Laptop: Please update Adobe."

"Vaginas are like the weather If its wet, its time to go inside."

"[first date] Me: don't let her know you're a lizard Her: why did you just say that? Me: (gets scared and loses my tail but I grow a new one)"

"I like my women like I like my milk Freshly made and trapped in the fridge"

"My sense of humor is a little crazy But the dragon rises into the potassium nitrate milkshake at sundown. It's a good day to be a helicopter."

"What do you call a gay dinosaur? Mega-Sore-Arse"

"What do you call a Mexican garden hose in Canada? Joseh"

"The only part I hate about not wearing pants is having to wipe snot on my bare legs."

"Two flies are sitting on a piece of shit. One fly cuts a fart. The other one says, ""Hey! I'm eatin' here!"""

"You ever heard the joke about the sandwich?.... ...I heard it was full of bologna"