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Joke of the Day
"I like my beer like i like my violence.. Domestic."
Next Joke
"A recent study has linked alcohol to the risk of stroke in women... but i got a dick so lets drink!"
"According to all these ""note to self"" sticky notes I am a very forgetful person also I have no idea what these notes mean"
"What's the hardest part about making a manicure joke? You really have to nail it"
"Conversation with my Dad. Me: ""The teacher was talking about strangling a student today!"" Dad:""She was probably just choking."""
"How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light-bulb? ""Go fuck yourself!"""
"One day I mixed my girlfriend up with flour and butter then I stirred in some milk and sugar. She's scone now..."
"What's SpongeBob's worst personality trait? He's way too self-absorbent"
"The only thing more important than your happiness is mine so get on it."
"To me, God will always be that guy that could've made Pokemon or Star Wars real but instead was all like, ""Nah bruh, malaria and AIDS."""