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Joke of the Day

"I'm dating a half-Asian girl. Her mom's Korean and her dad's Korean, and her legs got torn off in a car accident. - Dan Mintz"

"*phone rings* Wife - ""Quick! Pretend I'm not in!"" Me - *strips naked and does running man* Wife - ""...."""

"What sound does a bomb make before it goes off? allahu ackbar!!"

"Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying? For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving..."

"God grades on the cross, not the curve."

"When I'm Sad.. I sing, then realize my voice is worse than my problems."

"Me: Bless me father for I have sinned... Priest texting me back: I already told you, I'm not absolving u of your sins unless you come in."

"If they make a new Contra game with the original one as a minigame inside it... Will it be a contraception?"

"[nsfw] This is the worst joke I have heard.... What's the difference between an apple and a dead baby? You don't cum on an apple before you eat it..."

"what do asians do when they have an erection? they vote..."