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Joke of the Day

"Me: Bless me father for I have sinned... Priest texting me back: I already told you, I'm not absolving u of your sins unless you come in."

"I went to an Indian restaurant and asked for curry bread. But there was naan."

"I have trained a cup full of meal-worms to give me sexual pleasure... ...I'm a master baiter"

"What do you call a blind german? A not-see (Nazi)."

"What's the difference between a microwave and anal sex? A microwave doesn't brown your meat"

"So what if I can t spell Armageddan It s not the end of the world."

"Your honor, may I approach the bench? Judge: You may *benches 200lbs in 3 sets of 20 reps* The defense rests"

"Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he had a boner"

"Why did the boy throw the butter out the window? to see the butterFLY!"

"Today a Gender Studies student asked me how our society viewed lesbians Apparently, in HD wasn't the correct answer. Time to update my display to 4K."