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Joke of the Day

"Facebook tells me those vans are dangerous, but Twitter says they have candy. So conflicted."

"How many minimalists does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1"

"Why are people pissed off that Justin Bieber smoked some weed? It's not like he released another album or anything."

"I went on a date with a girl I met from twitter once. It didn't work out, but he's one of the nicest guys I've ever met."

"My friends told me to stop being a flamingo I decided to put my foot down!"

"Who's this Rorschach guy... And why does he paint so many penises?"

"I think my lab partner and I are finally hitting it off because I feel a lot of chemistry between us."

"Did r/jokes hear about the new Taco Bell Express yet? You give them 99c, and they throw a burrito in the toilet for you."

"What do you call a chess blunder where you lose your castle? A Rook-ey mistake."

"racist frat dudes.. now ive seen everything."