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Joke of the Day

"iOS 6 to present black screen with a big blinking ""NO!"" anytime someone tries to shoot video in portrait mode."

"What do you call someone who makes a lot of money through deforestation of the Amazon? A Brazillionaire!"

"How's it like living in a totalitarian regime? Can't complain."

"US Naval Communications"

"Husband: ""Waiter, my wife spilled her water"". Waiter: ""No problem, I'll get you another one"". Husband: ""Make sure the next one likes sports""."

"I can never decide whether to slam on my breaks or go through a yellow light, so I do an annoying combination."

"You know, I just love whiteboards... They're remarkable."

"Kids are so inquisitive. ""Will robots ever take over the world?"" Me: ""Almost certainly."" ""But when? Before I die?"" ""A bit before, yes."""

"99% of my socks are single. You don't see them crying about it."

"I think this belongs here. Mitt Romney"