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Joke of the Day
"wow thanks for dying grandpa that shit is blowing up my Facebook"
Next Joke
"When my child is born I'll paint flames on him so when I stand with the other parents at the nursery I can say ""Thats my son. The fast one."""
"maintenance guy at the airport just told me he'd rather look at girls' poop than guys' poop. No more small talk today."
"Did anyone else think that... Mel Gibson's remake of the 'Life of Brian' wasn't nearly as funny as the original?"
"Mum: Haven't you finished filling the salt shaker yet ? Son: Not yet. It's really hard to get the salt through all those little holes !"
"Q: Why did the bird get a ticket? A: It broke the law of gravity!"
"Why don't little girls fart? Because they don't get an asshole until they get married."
"*to commander* Don't say anything too loud sir I suspect one of our men may be a plant *conspicuous tree in admiral uniform starts to sweat*"
"A guy walks into a bar.... ...holding a set of jumper cables and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says ""okay, I'll serve you, but don't you start anything!"""
"A penguin walks into a bar and asks ""Has my brother been in here?"" And the bartender says ""I don't know. What does he look like?"""