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Joke of the Day

"Its funny how your parents tell you its their house, but as soon as something needs cleaning, it magically becomes yours too."

Next Joke
 
"Teacher: Fill out the parent form. Me: Why? Teacher: So I can contact you if your kid gets in trouble. Me: *writing* Raised. By. Wolves."
"I thought the big NYC ball was mechanically operated but I guess not. I heard Mariah Carey dropped it last night during her performance."
"I have the greatest dad ever Every year he got so mad when Santa didn't bring me presents"
"The word for today is legs Go out and spread the word!"
"Why did the girl quit her job at the doughnut factory? Because she was fed up with the hole business."
"What's the best thing about having Parkinson's? Never having to buy another electric toothbrush."
"The first time I run out of windshield wiper fluid is the last time I have windshield wiper fluid."
"What does an agnostic ... dyslexic insomniac do at night? He lays awake and wonders if there really is a dog."
"Why did the hipster die? He thought breathing was too mainstream"