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Joke of the Day

"Someone just tweeted something vague that made me think a celeb had died so I googled ""dead."" No dice! Thank god---hang in there, celebs!"

Next Joke
 
"What do you call an Indian guy who's seen it all? Been-there Done-that Sorry if it's been posted before but I just heard it from my Indian friend and thought I'd share"
"I like my coffee the same way I like my slaves.... Free."
"What food are you able to can? Cannibal (can able) food."
"*at interview* Him: What would you say are your strengths? Me: Words Him: Can you say more? Me: More Him: Me: I'm also good at directions"
"I would tell a chemistry joke.. But all the good ones Argon"
"What is the number 1 pickup line at a gay bar? May I push your stool in?"
"My wife and I adopted an abandoned newborn. She was affected by shaken baby syndrome... ...We're naming her Jostlelyne! I made that one up myself."
"A man visiting a graveyard saw a tombstone that read: ""Here lies John Smith, a lawyer and an honest man."" ""How about that!"" he exclaimed. ""They've got three people buried in one grave."""
"My daughter just asked for a Samsung Galaxy phone. Had to sit her down and explain to her we aren't poor. #iPhone"