207045
Joke of the Day
"What do you call a giant firebreathing lizard with a procrastination problem Dragon his feet"
Next Joke
"what the cell say to its sister cell when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis"
"""Hola! I'm Senor Coconut, children"" [cracks head on the pavement. Children scream] ""Drink me. Drink me. I'm full of vitamins and minerals"""
"I was peeing in the pool the other day... The lifeguard yelled at me so loudly, I nearly fell in."
"[God creating me] And then we sprinkle in just a touch of anxiety [the lid pops off and the whole jar spills in] [God shrugs] He'll be fine"
"How many marshmallows does it take to get to the moon? Purple, there are no bones in ice cream!"
"What did the trans-gender, pan-sexual, gender-fluid ogre say to the heterosexual male ogre? Shrek your privilege!"
"It would be really nice if everything was coffee."
"a 21st century Hitler would have Macklemore hair (the moustache was attempt to seem young & trendy) & he would call himself a ""race wonk"""
"Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are in a plane crash. Who survives? Not the joke."