121987

Joke of the Day

"""Hola! I'm Senor Coconut, children"" [cracks head on the pavement. Children scream] ""Drink me. Drink me. I'm full of vitamins and minerals"""

"My grandfather's favorite joke Q: How do you make a Peking Duck? A: Throw a brick at him. As my grandfather would say, ""That's as funny as a crutch."""

"Why did the Dollar note become 4 Quarters? Because it wanted ""to change"". *ducks*"

"Next update: Twitter will tell you what the retweeter is feeling as they retweet your retweet. And what they had for breakfast."

"So, I was bragging about watermelons look like to my friends now she says we cantaloupe."

"It's a real shame Friday doesn't come as quick as I do"

"purposely bought tall lace up boots so I'll never have to be anywhere on time again"

"A liberal, a conservative and a moderate walk into a bar. The bartender says ""Afternoon, Mitt! What can I get for you?"""

"Did you hear about the solider that survived a mustard gas attack and a pepper spray attack? He's now a seasoned veteran."

"What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair"