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Joke of the Day

"Nobel Peace Prize I would kill for one of those"

"How do you circumcise a hillbilly? Kick his sister in the jaw!"

"""I gotta 'A' in spelling"" Tony told his father. ""You dope!"" he replied. ""There isn't any 'A' in 'spelling'!"""

"I don't mean to brag but I just beat my 5-year-old ten times in a row at air hockey. He sucks."

"My new toothpaste reminds me of the united states next president I can feel the burn"

"Lion King is my favourite movie about an innocent baby animal. Being framed for murder."

"Why can't you fool an aborted fetus Because it wasn't born yesterday"

"So a silver mine collapsed in Germany... So a silver mine collapsed in Germany, I guess you could say that's one mein fuhrer. I don't know if that exists or not, but as far as I know, I made that up."

"The only reason I ever get any women is because of who I am A rapist."

"How do you get out of a Russian prison? You have Vladmir Putin a word for you."