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Joke of the Day

"Why are Sharks the only species that get their own week? I'd totally watch hermit crab week if they had one."

"If you drop your pants for a ""surprise checkup"" and hear your doctor's belt buckle hit the floor, you should probably head for the hills"

"How many PETA members does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything."

"When the president is lonely what does he say? I'm Obama-self."

"I heard that you only use like 10% of your brain. That leaves what, 82-83%?"

"A friend made a list of questions for his mom to answer about childhood flashbacks She threw them out"

"I think we all know Lincoln Chaffee won the Democratic debate last night."

"What do you call a frog that's parked illegally? Toad."

"Mr. Trump, who's your Secretary of State? TRUMP: To deal with China, one that speaks Mandarin [remembers to appeal to women] or Womandarin"

"What do you call a Rhinoceros mixed with a Rooster? A horny cock."