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Joke of the Day

"What to you get if you cross a parrot with an elephant ? An animal that tells you everything that it remembers !"

"You know what's odd? Numbers that are not divisible by 2"

"What are you doing on Valentines Day? I'm getting my hands massaged."

"One time I did mushrooms and played GTA and felt regret for the lives I was taking I was all ""Holy shit these people have families"""

"What word in the dictionary is always spelled wrong? Wrong."

"Mom, what's an orgasm? Child: ""Mom, what's an orgasm?"" Mom: ""I don't know, dear. I never had one."" Dad: (Thinking) ""This bitch."""

"What do you do when a timeline dies? Barry it."

"Wondering why Google has a black ribbon today... I think I forgot something."

"What do you call a man who you are not sure will become your friend? A training brah."

"""the names bond, james bond"" [5 min later] STARBUCKS BARISTA: i gota frappe for borbjorbple"