20658

Joke of the Day

"A ham sandwich walks into a bar. Sits down. The bartender comes over and the ham sandwich says: > I'd like a triple of bourbon, neat. Bartender says: > I'm sorry, we don't serve food here."

"*sends back food because instagram down*"

"What do you get if you take the red circle off a Japanese flag? The French flag."

"I was seeing a therapist for trust issues, but I had to quit going when I found out he was seeing other patients."

"White trash girl How do you get a white trash girl to suck your dick? Dip it in ranch dressing."

"My wife wants me to take a walk with her today. I'll be on a short leash though so I won't run off into the woods like last time."

"Do you know what the difference is between a white person and a black person that sell drugs? One is a pharmacist and one is a drug dealer!"

"If a cop yells at you to GET DOWN just start twerking cause damn, dude, be more specific"

"Date: Do u have any allergies? Me: I'm allergic to raisins. They make me cry D: That's an unusual reaction M: They could've been wine!!"

"How do Reavers clean their spears? They send them through the Wash."