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Joke of the Day

"I bet when they discovered the radish everyone was like ""Let's name it Rad!"" and one guy was all ""Let's dial that back a bit."""

"Q. Why is the book ""Women Who Love Too Much"" a disappointment for many men? A. No phone numbers."

"Remake of Last tango in Paris butter scene What would the actress played by Maria Schneider say to Marlon Brando in the new version of famous butter scene: I can't believe it's not BUTTer !"

"I was confused the other day when someone told me I can make ice cubes with left over wine. What the fuck is ""left over wine""?"

"I mainly want to lose weight to get into my own pants But also to get into someone elses"

"Why did Aladdin have a shoe on his crotch? Because he told the Genie he wanted his penis to grow a foot."

"Did you hear George R R Martin committed suicide? Yeah. I saw it coming too."

"If you think my tweets are bad, you should see my choice in men."

"I just ran 4.1 Kms and realized you can write anything you want after that and no one will read it purple monkey dishwasher."

"I just ran into a doorknob and swore at it but in all honesty, like 99.9% of my doorknob interactions all-time have been positive & helpful"