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Joke of the Day

"FRIEND: Don is flying in tomorrow ME: My cousin Don or Amazing Hearing Don? [I get a text] Amazing Hearing Don"

"Keep your friends close and your fat friends closer, because snacks."

"9 out of 10 therapist agree to just be yourself The other one realizes that's what got you into this shit in the first place."

"how much does a polar bear weigh? enough to break the ice what's up girl my name is bill"

"Cation Pronunciation : [kat-ahy-uhn,-on] -Noun Chemistry 1.An ion with paws-tive charge. 2.The cutest ion ever."

"Shout out to my self-aware friends, you know who you are"

"Apparently White men can't jump! Yeah? well black men can't act!"

"A mortician died in a small town He showed up to work late"

"How do you kill a circus? Go for the juggler!"

"Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but... Catscan."