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Joke of the Day

"How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb? Two - One to put it most of the way in, and one to give it an interesting twist at the end."

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"'Don't say foreskin instead of four score don't say foreskin instead of four score you GOT this Abe' *AHEM* ""FORESKIN FUCK LEMME START OVER"""
"What's the best thing about an Ethiopian? They'll always swallow"
"Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers? In case he got a hole in one."
"If you surround yourself with people who are full of drama, don't bitch if a shitstorm is always blowing through your life."
"What's frozen water and dangerous? ISIS"
"Is this Love? by Midas Wellbee"
"why didn't the cannibal want to be late to dinner? Because he didn't want to get the cold shoulder."
"Mom: You need to get a hobby. Me: Like photography? Mom: I don't think stalking the garbageman is a hobby."
"What's red and orange and looks good on hippies.... Fire."