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Joke of the Day

"What's frozen water and dangerous? ISIS"

"As a Harry Potter fan, I dream of going to Hogwarts. My friend is a Narnia fan, and he's always wanted to go to Narnia. My other friend is a Hunger Games fan, but he's good."

"I went for my physical yesterday. Nurse came in the room and she said ""I'm going to have to ask you to stop masturbating"" I was like ""What? Why!?"" She said ""because I'm trying to do your physical!"""

"I have a joke that will make you look stupid. Oh. I see you have already heard it."

"What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You pull the pin and throw it back."

"Have you heard the one about the bed? No? That's 'cause it hasn't been made yet."

"After years of commercials, I still have no idea what a Go Daddy is"

"What did the leper say to the hooker? Keep the tip"

"Why does history keep repeating itself ? Because we weren't listening the first time !"

"If someone feeds you alphabet soup... Is that putting words in your mouth? Also, if they are about to feed you and pull back, is that taking the words out of your mouth?"