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Joke of the Day

"Help! Has anybody seen a little boy with a corndog? Stranger: He's over there! Oh thank God! [steals little boy's corndog and runs away]"

"There is a special place for people who leave long voicemails, but until the ground thaws, they stay in the freezer."

"The Irish must be very rich... ...since their capital is always Dublin"

"my criminal record is only clean because of how fast i can run with my pants around my ankles."

"What do you call a Jewish person who is suicidal? A Yamikaze."

"How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his coffee before it was cool.."

"What do most women hate to hear while having sex? Honey, I'm home!"

"I'm married to a nut I guess you could say I'm fucking nuts."

"No one ever mentions the 1000 miles of trouble free luxury cruising before the iceberg....."

"Why couldn't the expert fisherman get any dates? Because he said he was a master baiter."