205157

Joke of the Day

"Batman walks into a bar..... followed by 13 sodium atoms...... (for all you chemists out there....)"

"[Installing ceiling fan] Me: drill...screwdriver... tape...there finished! Wife on the phone: Is this Bob's fix-it shop? Yeah, he just got done."

"Ever heard of the blind hooker? You really gotta hand it to 'er."

"What do comic book collectors use in their hair when they shower? Mint conditioner."

"Yesterday I heard there was a robbery at a bakery, I've heard of stupid crimes... But this one really takes the cake."

"My son was thrown out of school today for letting a girl in his class wank him off. I said "" son thats 3 schools this year, maybe teaching isn't for you"""

"I love my relationship with my bed. No commitment needed. We just sleep together every night."

"How does a tail pipe feel after a long car ride? exhausted."

"*Becomes a black hole* *Only absorbs corndogs*"

"A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer. ."