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Joke of the Day

"I don't drink so that I'm more fun to be around. I drink so that you're more fun to be around."

"""And for our next lesson, we'll learn how to roll a blunt, or un cigarrillo marijuana"" - Rosetta Stoned"

"OC: What does a limo driver and a hairy stripper have in common? They both get paid to chauffeur. (show fur)"

"""Mom, where did people come from?"" ""God created us"" ""But Dad said we came from monkeys"" ""Dad told you about his side of the family. I am telling you about mine"""

"Someone at this party is wearing the same shirt as me. It's very awkward. How did this happen. We barely even fit in this shirt."

"My friend really changed when she became a vegetarian... it's like I've never seen herbivore. edit: I think I summoned the pun cult."

"What is Trump's favorite movie? ""Octopussy"""

"To their credit, selfie sticks may be the only proof future archaeologists have to dispute the notion cameras grew directly out of our arms"

"What was Cambodia's biggest export in the 90s? Pol Potting mix."

"Why did Karl Marx hate Earl Grey? Because all proper tea is theft."