203313
Joke of the Day
"That's a nice sham you've got there... It'd be a shame if somebody added an e"
Next Joke
"My wife has the cutest crow's feet. And the strongest little crow beak. My wife is a crow. Her name is Leah."
"I Dropped Out of Elementary School Because of Recess.. I don't play games."
"[explain this joke] Phil Hartman ""what's the word on the street?"" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2X2hqdOMxyM&t=9m34s different version http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0500148/quotes?item=qt0199251"
"During my prostate exam I asked the doctor, ""where should I put my pants""? ""Over there by mine"", was not the answer I was expecting."
"3 - DAD! HEY DAD! Me: Don't yell from the door son! Walk here and talk to me 3 - *walks over* 3 - I stepped in dog poop, what should I do?"
"In the meantime I plan on absolutely crushing it over on LinkedIn."
"When people fall with their iPhone 6 in pocket and hear a crack sound: ""Please let it be my leg, Lord."""
"[restaurant] *patpatpat* ME: you hear that? *patpatPATPAT* DATE: what the [penguin bolts out of kitchen with a fish] CHEF: SOMEBODY STOP HIM"
"What did the mad cow say to the other cow? You don't want beef with me"