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Joke of the Day

"Guys I'm like next to Austria right now... Hungary, I could really go for a cheeseburger..."

"You should be proud of who you are! Unless you're a straight white male."

"I get so many panic attacks, that If I was a wrestler my signature move would be 'The Chest Clutch', where I get pinned as I grab my chest."

"Confucius Says Baseball is wrong. Man with 4 balls cannot walk."

"TIFU in a hot air balloon ... It was amazing."

"A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells ""You should have been here at 8:30!"" He replies: ""Why? What happened at 8:30?"""

"What did Scooby Doo ask Shaggy for to order online porn? A Reddit card"

"A criminal tried to escape federal jurisdiction by running across the southern border, but then he had a sudden realization.. He was in Tasmania"

"Jehovah's witnesses are at my door. *Lights black candles, dons flowing dress, opens door, and says seductively, ""Are you the keymaster?""*"

"Why didn't the penguin close on his mortgage? He had cold feet."