202398

Joke of the Day

"I've just been robbed by a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Though ironically, he wasn't wearing a mask so I don't know which one he was."

"""People should never again say that if they had a time machine, they'd go back & stop Hitler. Because we now know nobody would."" - my kid"

"Which U.S Presidents are not buried inside the United States? Carter, the Bushes, Clinton, and Barry-O"

"I used to live in a tea cup I know what you're thinking, pour you"

"Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he was stuck to the chicken..."

"Always Wanted to get Married My daughter always dreamed of getting married when she was a little girl. So we converted to Islam."

"I work for the government which means I have to enter 2 passwords in order to print documents that are open to the public."

"Why would anyone come on Twitter JUST to argue? Don't you have an ex, or a spouse, or a family member that you can argue with?"

"men prefer large boobs 9 out of 10 men prefer large boobs. The other man prefers the 9 men."

"How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only two, but its kinda hard to get em in there."