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Joke of the Day
"What lives in a tree and is dangerous? A crow with a machine gun."
Next Joke
"Top Five Accountant Taboos: 5. Unreconciled difference 4. Doesn't foot & crossfoot 3. No journal entry support 2. Cooking the books 1. Sex"
"I'm attracted to fat chicks... ...by the force of gravity"
"What did the child with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves. Just kidding, he hasn't opened it yet."
"I took ten photos of myself in the shower, but hated them all. Turns out I have selfie-steam issues"
"I legally changed my name to Edward Genocide... ...you can call me Ed G."
"Blind dates are the best They don't even see me coming"
"A cruise ship with a Gay Pride party on board... ran into a storm and began to take on water quickly but by some miracle did not sink. What saved the ship? ""flambuoyancy"""
"What do you call a Spanish man who has just got out of hospital? Manuel..."
"""excuse me, (Chinese couple at the next table,) I seem to have forgotten my calculator, can I borrow your toddler?"""