201754

Joke of the Day

"What do you find in a pumpkins pants? A Halloweenie!"

"How do you call a prison inmate? With a cell phone."

"There are over 4 million workplace injuries reported every year. Play it safe...call in sick tomorrow."

"I was thinking of joining the Hug-A-Cactus foundation but I hear they deal with alot of pricks."

"When the doctor told me I only had six months to live, I killed him violently with his own pencil. Worked a treat. Got me twenty years."

"Why don't they have a WHITE history month?? Why don't they have NON-handicapped parking spaces? Why's there no cemetery for ALIVE people??"

"Grocery store just charged me $0.10 to offset the environmental impact of my bag and then gave me a paper receipt 3 feet long."

"how to tell your girl shes getting fat (actual convo on valentines day with my girl) me-i love fruit, her-i love chips, me- you better start to love fruit or youl love handles"

"What do you call a rabbit with fleas? Bugs Bunny! [ ](http://multivu.prnewswire.com/mnr/warnerbros/42096/images/42096-hi-Bugs_Bunny.jpg)"

"Customer: Why does your sign say ""Fine Dining""? Waiter: We can dream can't we?"