201688

Joke of the Day

"A skinny girl and an overweight girl are standing in line on Friday morning. As the Walmart manager unlocks the door, skinny girl says, ""remember, black Friday lives matter."""

"What do you call an angry reticle? A cross-hair"

"If I was a DJ... I'd wanna be called JD Dyslexic."

"Why did the dictator's plane crash? It was stallin'"

"My Girlfriend is anorexic. It's not going so well... I am seeing less and less of her everyday."

"Apparently for every $1 a man makes, a woman makes 70 cents. That's not fair. Why is the man only left with 30? Credit to Bo Burnham."

"Remember, it's not a real paleo diet unless you're eating mammoth every day."

"Why old people don't have sex? Have you ever tried pulling a grilled cheese apart?"

"what do you call Coq Au Vin made with Two Buck Chuck? Chick n' Chuck!"

"I recently got a tattoo with Chinese symbols that reads, ""I don't know. I don't speak Chinese."" Then when people ask me what it means..."