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Joke of the Day

"There is a chair The chair walk, with shoes! La-la-la-la-la! It walk on the street. The chair is walking."

"Why are so many people in San Francisco homeless? They can't afford an apartment because they only make 50 grand per year."

"I'm a prince in Lagos, Nigeria and I want you to help me move $500 million out of the country."

"*knock knock* ""Sir, this is the police, open the door immediately"" ""But I'm having a poo"" ""We know sir, the phone box has glass sides"""

"My friend brags to me all the time about the women he has seen naked We both agreed the internet is awesome."

"What do you call someone who's afraid of Santa getting stuck in their chimney? Claus-trophobic."

"BEST PICK UP LINE: I wasn't looking at your boobs, I was staring into your heart...no, I lied , your boobs are awesome."

"Time zones are amazing, it's a different time all around the world. For example, in some parts of the U.S. it's still 1950."

"DATING TIP: Girls like bad boys! Brag about your Twitter gang."

"Today my friend accused me of being condescending. It's ridiculous, I don't even think he knows what that word means."