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Joke of the Day

"After Israel threatened to take the Security Council vote as an act of war, the New Zealand Ambassador called Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu.... ...Picking up the phone, he spoke ""Hebrew."""

Next Joke
 
"How did Christopher Columbus 'discover' America? By occident"
"You would be amazed how cheap lawn mowers are at Home Depot when you own a pickup truck and a orange apron."
"What is a seal's favorite drink? Club soda"
"So in conclusion, the burglars in Home Alone 2 absolutely would have died. Thanks for coming to my Ted talk"
"If you ever get cold... Just stand in a corner. They're usually around 90 degrees!"
"Why don't you invite a Comcast worker to your party? Because nobody likes his company!"
"Technically all breakfasts are continental, unless you eat them in the ocean."
"My wife called me a pedophile and a bigamist I thought those were some big words for a jealous six year old"
"When people ask, ""Don't I know you from somewhere?"", I reply ""Yes, we were best friends as children until you murdered my puppy."""