200970
Joke of the Day
"Question to a crying child Q: Why did the drunken father go to jail? A: Beats me"
Next Joke
"watching the kids play hide and seek in the park and mine just hid behind a chain link fence at least we don't have to save for college"
"Pizza is like racism. America didn't invent it, but it's hard to find a country that does it better."
"The ""Personal life"" section of my Wikipedia article is actually pretty accurate. It's non-existent."
"How many 'friend-zoned' guys does it take to change a light bulb? None they just compliment it and get pissed when it won't screw."
"I've spent the past few months looking for my ex-boyfriends' killer but no one will do it."
"My wife says she is no longer buying junk food for the family because, ""Everyone just eats it."""
"I've been looking for the lid for this Tupperware container and somehow I'm now three weeks late for work."
"Me: For Christmas I want a girlfriend/boyfriend Santa: Let's be realistic lol"
"I like my Jews like I like my subway... Toasted."