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Joke of the Day
"How do you know when a cat's done cleaning itself? It's smoking a cigarette."
Next Joke
"Who is an archaeologist? One whose career is in ruins."
"I thought I saw an octopus but it was just 8 eels kissing a butternut squash."
"What does Marilyn Quayle have in common with Marion Barry? They've both been known to blow a little dope."
"What did the Agnostic Dyslexic Insomniac do? He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog."
"Be nice to a nerd. Prevent a supervillain."
"My hangover has been going on for so long that I'm beginning to wonder if Peter Jackson directed it."
"Whenever your girlfriend tells you she's on her period remember not to say things like ""that explains it."""
"Almost every McDonalds A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunchtime. She said 'sorry about the wait'. I said, 'Don't worry, you'll find a way to lose it eventually'."
"My wife has the body of a 16 year old She keeps it in the fridge."