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Joke of the Day
"What's the best way to get the aristocracy out of France? A chopper"
Next Joke
"In Pokemon, I never understood why bug types were supereffective against dark types. But then I thought about malaria in Africa and it all made sense."
"Juneau the capital of Alaska?"
"Cat Negotiator: Ok, so we'll shit in a box in your house and you will clean it up Humans: And you will be a loyal friend Cat: hahahaha sure"
"If I ever get attacked by a shark I can only hope that I'm smart enough to get out at least one Jaws quote before I go under."
"Two goldfish are in a tank... One said, ""you man the guns, and I'll drive""."
"Sometimes a man has needs that can't be fulfilled in the home. [goes to animal shelter and pets all the cats]"
"Protip: Never look up from your breakfast if you hear the words ""gruesome discovery"" coming from your TV on the morning news."
"Why are power tools good for bank robberies? They know the drill."
"What do you call an edible ion? An onion"