20010

Joke of the Day

"If your best clothes proudly advertise Monster Energy Drink, you can't be left alone with your best looking cousin."

"Who says, ""Phlbbbbtfffbllph I NEED TO SAVE THE WORLD IN LESS THAN 24 HOURS phlbbbbtthhphhbbl"" Queefer Sutherland."

"You look like something I'd draw with my left hand"

"The fact that I have to debate evolution with people means it doesn't work quite as well as I'd like it to."

"How do you pick up a Jewish girl? With a dust pan."

"When clowns first attacked these shores nobody took it seriously. It's just one boat, how many could there be, they said."

"How do you blow up an Indian ? Press the red button on their forehead."

"What do you call a man who excels at fishing? A master baiter"

"I learned mathematical fractions from a drug dealer. He said if I don't pay $4,000 in 7 days, I'll lose 3 fingers."

"How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only two, but I don't know how they get in there."