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Joke of the Day

"How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to change bulbs and 3 to sit around and complain that the original was better."

"My ex just asked if I want to go on holiday with him and my ex mother-in-law and now I don't need Twitter because I will never stop laughing"

"Damn Shakira is doing Activia commercials too now. With all that belly dancing, you'd think she'd be able to shit. Who knew."

"Angelina's Twins Photographed In Public For First Time"

"The nice thing of living in a small village is that when you don't know what you're doing someone else does."

"There are two ways to trigger a nuclear chain reaction: ... The first involves hitting uranium with accelerated protons. The second is mentioning Hillary and Feminism in one sentence."

"50 Cent has about 50 cents left"

"What do you always get on your birthday? Another year older!birt"

"[mall] Me: That guy looks SO familiar! Wife: ... M: Maybe an actor? Musician? W: ... M: I'll get an autograph! W: He's our mailman, moron."

"What did the Time Traveller find when he brought a joint to Ancient Greece? The Philosophers Stoned"