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Joke of the Day

"Which American President was least guilty? Abraham Lincoln. He was in a cent."

"Wanna hear a dirty joke? Billy played in the mud. Wanna hear a clean joke? Billy took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear another dirty joke? Bubbles is his neighbour."

"Twitter is kinda like my diary except I don't use a glitter gel pen or tell you guys how much I miss Josh."

"Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie from drowning? He was *too far out, maaan*."

"I don't care who you are, but if you're reading this I still don't care."

"A neutron walks into a store Neutron : ""How much is this pack of gum"" Store Clerk : ""For you it's no charge"""

"B:You can never be possessed by any demonic beings. G:Why? Is it because I am very religious? B:No! Its because you are always so salty"

"New diet plan: murder all the skinny people."

"Which teachers care the most about their students? Math teachers, because every student counts."

"What did the website say to the Google bot after their breakup? I knew you'd come crawling back to me someday."