199187

Joke of the Day

"Was starting to get romantic with a woman last night As usual I began crying uncontrollably. After getting home it took forever to wash the pepper spray off."

"You guys hear that Bono fell off the stage at the big U2 concert last night? He got a little too close to the edge."

"The Nokia 3310 was ahead of its time... Dust proof, water proof, had a nearly infinite battery life, indestructible, AND no audio jack!"

"What kind of disease do you get from birds? Chirpes. It's a canarial disease, and I hear it's untweetable."

"I cant believe I got fired from the calendar factory I mean, I only took a day off"

"What did the bean say to the other bean? How you been?"

"Please hold so I can transfer you to a supervisor and accidentally hang up on you."

"How much toilet paper do people use on a daily basis? A shit ton."

"Being a vegan makes no sence. My food is vegan so I dont have to be. Edit: Sense"

"Two peanuts were walking down the street One of them was assaulted"