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Joke of the Day

"How much toilet paper do people use on a daily basis? A shit ton."

"I like my women the way i like my luxury cars Blacked out"

"Did you know the anthem of the USA is about a Mexican immigrant? The first line is even about how he got in illegally at night: ""Jose can you see, by the dawn's early light..."""

"Just saw a squirrel jump about 15 feet from one tree to another. He is now my new emergency contact."

"There are three kinds of people in the world, Those who are good at math and those who aren't."

"Just got some new ecstasy pills from Moscow.. I'm absolutely Russian my tits off!"

"Remember the undies with the days of the week on them, Monday, Tuesday....? In Romania we had something similar, our girls on their undies had January, February...."

"What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap? He said ""Sure! I could loan some Dove""."

"I thought about buying used toilet paper But I hear it's pretty shitty"

"What did the parrot say when he was using the Internet? P.Cs of eight P.Cs of eight."