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Joke of the Day
"I bet the guy who named it The Big Bang was super horny that day."
Next Joke
"God was truly looking out for me today I opened a bag of air and found a few Lay's potato chips inside."
"I entered an astronomy competition the other day... ...I didn't come first but I did get a constellation prize "
"Rent boat. Go out to sea. Find sperm whale. Tell him he's called sperm whale. Console sperm whale. Have fun with new whale best friend."
"Nice try little pine tree air freshener, but this gas station restroom needs the efforts of an entire forest."
"When I die... I want to go peacefully in my sleep. Like my father. Not screaming and yelling. Like his passengers"
"What do you call slapping hands with (5^.5+1)/2? A high phive! I'll see myself out now."
"If we're going to do racist jokes How's a Mexican like a cue ball? The harder you hit it the more English it picks up!"
"Would you like to hear a joke? The republican primary debate."
"Whats the difference between a performance by a female pornstar and an act by an escape artist? One is a cunning stunt, the other has a stunning cunt."