198859

Joke of the Day

"Know-it-alls think themselves a fountain of knowledge. In truth they are an oil spill of knowledge... Unwelcome and hard to get rid of."

"Did you hear about... Did you hear about the blind circumciser? He got the sack!"

"one plus one equals a window"

"Dating tip: don't mention your time as a Boy Scout, let your sash full of badges do the talkin."

"My voicemail greeting is just me strangling a cat while reading bible passages."

"Mom, can you take us to the maul? -teen bears, probably"

"Just finished a chat via text msg in which the girl finished every single sentence with ""lol"". It was draining lol. Wanna kill myself lol."

"Some might say I peed my pants. I like to say I voided my bladder into my trousers like the classy refined gentleman that I am. #bt140"

"I just bought a Christmas tree and my buddy asked, ""Are you going to put that up yourself?"" I replied, ""No, I was thinking the living room."""

"I found a girl with 12 tits... Sounds funny, dozen tit?"