198859

Joke of the Day

"Know-it-alls think themselves a fountain of knowledge. In truth they are an oil spill of knowledge... Unwelcome and hard to get rid of."

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"Did you hear about... Did you hear about the blind circumciser? He got the sack!"
"one plus one equals a window"
"Dating tip: don't mention your time as a Boy Scout, let your sash full of badges do the talkin."
"My voicemail greeting is just me strangling a cat while reading bible passages."
"Mom, can you take us to the maul? -teen bears, probably"
"Just finished a chat via text msg in which the girl finished every single sentence with ""lol"". It was draining lol. Wanna kill myself lol."
"Some might say I peed my pants. I like to say I voided my bladder into my trousers like the classy refined gentleman that I am. #bt140"
"I just bought a Christmas tree and my buddy asked, ""Are you going to put that up yourself?"" I replied, ""No, I was thinking the living room."""
"I found a girl with 12 tits... Sounds funny, dozen tit?"