198839

Joke of the Day

"Punctuation can really change a sentence. For example, ""Let's eat kids"" becomes ""Let's eat punctuation""."

"I bet sex with a stingray is like fucking a giant pancake."

"My parents and teachers told me I could be whatever I wanted to be but I'm 28 years old now and I'm still not a crime-fighting mermaid :("

"When I see 18 wheelers carrying something covered with a tarp, I just assume that it's an injured Transformer."

"What did the pink panther say as he skipped down the sidewalk? Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant dead ant dead ant dead annnnnt, deaaad ant."

"I took an IQ test. The results were negative."

"Why is it easy for chicks to talk ? Because talk is cheep !"

"You threw. Our tea. In the harbour. And then you changed the spelling of harbour. We do not. Forget."

"So two muffins are in an oven... One muffin turns to the other and says, ""Boy! It is getting hot in here!"" The other muffin replies, ""WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HEAR US SCREAM"""

"I can not stand the new style with hip hop music, they say one word then repeat it a dozen times. It is so freakin annoying and lame lame lame lame lame."