198212

Joke of the Day

"Today I Almost Fucked Up by finishing with a bad bunch line Whoops-"

"Is it I 'ran' through the campground? Or...I 'run' through the campground? Oh right, I ran, because its past tents."

"It's so rough where I live ... We don't have Jehova's witnesses, we have Jehova's bystanders (who are like ""We didn't see nothing"")"

"If life was a video game it would be created by EA Because you have to pay real money inside the game."

"Cop behind me just turned. Best unfollow ever."

"I did a survey and asked 5 women what kind of clothing brand they preferred. The 5 responded: ""How the hell did you get into my house?"""

"[food naming committee] ... Ok. Cow? - Beef Ground up? - Burger Great. Pig? - Pork Baked & sliced? - Ham Super! Deer? - Venison Fish? - Fish"

"Needs a Facebook button that says What you just posted makes me want to punch you in the face. Put it beside the Like button. Just a suggestion."

"How do you find the blind man in a nudist colony? It's not hard."

"I am not well... ... neither am I a river!"