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Joke of the Day
"The inventor of predictive text has died His funfair is hello on sundial."
Next Joke
"SOBER is actually an acronym that stands for: Son Of a Bitch, Everything's Real"
"WebMD says pregnancy symptoms are fatigue, tender breasts, irritability, cravings, and headaches. All chicks are pregnant. All. The. Time."
"Sometimes love is like having one too many drinks....you feel so good that you don't notice you're making a fool of yourself."
"PARK RANGER: to be a guide you need to be able to name all the animals ME: no problem [later w/ a group] ME: that's Greg, & that's Linda..."
"Do you think Reese Witherspoon calls her kids Reese's Pieces cause I hope so."
"My favorite superheros are.. Baskin and Robbin!"
"They say there's safety in numbers... Well tell that to 6 million Jews"
"Pregnancy I'm too smart to want children, but not smart enough to make *her* not want 'em."
"Today is a 10/10 day guys 10/10/2015"