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Joke of the Day
"Why did the geologist's wife leave him? He took her for granite."
Next Joke
"Capitalization is important. NSFW Capitalization is the difference between ""I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse."" and ""I had to help my uncle jack off a horse."""
"Make someone's day better by not showing up for work"
"Two Scarecrows are standing out in a field... One says to the other, ""Hey man!"""
"They should do a scene in a comedy movie where someone rides their bike into a parked car."
"If someone on your bus says ""my butthole is 28"", what do you think that means, exactly?"
"[at interview] Her: In three words or less, tell me why we should hire you. Me: I'm good with numbers."
"*makes plans with someone* (30 seconds later) what have I done"
"Cell references in excel are like gold diggers. If you want them to stay in the same place you have to throw some money at them."
"Hey you know what's the hardest part of juggling? Telling girls you're not in the mood for sex."