197719

Joke of the Day

"Why are high end clocks designed and made in Switzerland? As they don't get arrested for doing their job as they do in America!"

"How many parents does it take to raise a homicidal maniac? Two, then one, then none"

"What's the difference between a bitch and a slut? A slut will fuck everybody in the room a bitch will fuck everybody in the room, except for you."

"Mirror Inspector When I think about it, inspecting mirrors is a job I could really see myself doing."

"A robber runs out of a store with a stolen TV. The blonde cashier runs after him yelling, ""Wait, you forgot the remote!"""

"If a guy says he can't feel anything while wearing a condom... Ask him if he can feel the money being sucked out of his paycheck for the next 18 years"

"Why is it hard to watch two elephants boxing? Because they've got the same colour trunks."

"A wizard walks into a gay bar.... ...and disappeared with a poof"

"What is a Nuclear Physicist's favourite meal? Fission chips."

"I always make a point to add a 'man' when I say thanks to the pizza delivery guy, so he knows I used to smoke weed and shit."