197267

Joke of the Day

"One day I hope to be rich enough where I don't feel compelled to refill my fountain soda before I leave a fast food establishment."

"Make a fire with someone and they'll be warm for a night. Make a fire with someone and they'll be warm for the rest of their life."

"Why did the console player cross the road? To render the buildings on the other side."

"Why are Juggalos obsessed with hatchets? Felons can't buy guns"

"Why shouldn't you carry two half dollars in your pocket? Because two halves make a whole (hole) and you could lose your money."

"Me: this is bullshit. conditioner and shampoo in one? impossible Walmart employee who I have in a headlock: sir I didn't make the shampoo"

"chuck norris's daughter had her virginity stolen:chuck norris stole it back"

"I went to look at tents today. But I didn't buy one. There was nothing before them, there was no pre-tents."

"I was Given a Madden Game Guide My friend handed me a game guide on the game series Madden I gave it back to him and said It made me Maddened"

"Tried new pain medication, and an hour later 3 penguins in military fatigues walked into the room and told me I need to kill Mussolini's cat"