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Joke of the Day

"*puts crime-scene photos in a rocket* Ok stand back ""Detective, what are u doing?"" What does it look like, I'm launching this investigation"

"It's weird for Me not having a Pope. I feel like Burns without Smithers."

"How did the hipster drown? By swimming in the main stream."

"Girl just asked me to talk dirty so I described the space behind my fridge."

"What is the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair."

"My friend is afraid of fruit. So I told him to grow a pear."

"A chicken stood in my way at the grocery store It was the biggest Cock Block of my life"

"What is the driest soda you can buy? Baking soda."

"Babe Ruth Walks Into a Bar Bartender says ""Why the Long Balls?"

"On a date, she said ""You smell nice. What have you got on?"" ""I've got a hard on. But I didn't know you could smell it."""