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Joke of the Day
"Doctors gave me an IQ test at the hospital. The results were negative."
Next Joke
"So I just moved to a new area... And as usual I had to tell everyone that I am a registered sex offender. Just kidding, nobody's found out yet."
"I only want to know 1 thing form a fortune teller; where I am going to die. Because then I'd never go there!"
"To protest Donald Sterling's racist comments I'm going to continue to not care about basketball."
"I organized a threesome for (NAME)'s last night of freedom. There were a couple of no-shows, but he still had fun."
"The last time we had a white Christmas, I made snow angels. I skidded on the ice and took out three pedestrians."
"I bet kangaroos get tired of holding all of their friend's keys and cell phones while they're at the beach."
"People who have wheels on their office chair, how do you get any work done?"
"my favorite part about magazine interviews with actors are the 3 first paragraphs describing how they entered the hotel and sat down"
"When I see a car accident I pull over quickly to assist the drivers with getting rid of any drugs they may have in the car."