196414

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between 'your mum' and 'knock knock' jokes? A door doesn't let you come inside."

"Worst case scenario for the 'coin behind the ear' trick is finding a tumour there and being accused of dark magic."

"What do you call Taylor Swift when she squats low? No ass to the grass"

"What's the difference between a dog and your best friend? The dog doesn't fuck your wife and walk the house in your robe"

"I tried to teach my illiterate nymphomanic girlfriend the alphabet. But she only wanted the D. I'm testing this joke here before i try it on my critics of mates."

"Go to a parking lot and put sticky notes on people's cars saying ""sorry for the damage."" Film reactions. Profit."

"POLLY GETS A CRACKER WHEN HE STOPS REFERRING TO HIMSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON, and not a moment before. Stupid bird."

"Condescending: (adj) showing patronizing superiority (verb) a convict shimmying down a prison wall with a rope made of bed sheets."

"How do vampires like their tea? With a old tampon in it."

"Apparently if you call out your own name while masturbating they will kick you off this ferris wheel."